My sophomore semester of nursing school, we started prepping for the NLCEX (our state boards) by taking an exam called the HESI. It's a precursor to the NCLEX and helps you understand the format of the exam and the style of questions you will have on your NCLEX. The HESI is hard. It gets harder each time you take it (or at least it did to me) because the questions are at a higher level. We took one as sophomores, one at the end of our junior semester, and the final HESI earlier on in our senior semester.
When you take the HESI as a senior, you get 4 chances to pass the test, and it counts as a pre-requistite for graduating. Thankfully, I passed my first HESI my senior semester. I had friends that didn't pass the first time, but some passed the second time. I had friends that didn't pass until the third time. I had friends that pass the fourth one right at the end of the semester. "They" (being the teachers) said it was an indication of how well you attempt at the NLCEX would go. I'm proud to say that all of my group of nursing school friends passed their NLCEX the first time, so take THAT nay-sayers! ;)
I graduated June 15th, and had already submitted my application to test (authorization to test or ATT for short) and applied to get my temporary license. Due to the fact that so many nursing students graduated in april/may/june/july, processing application requests took a little time. Anxiety set in for most, including myself. I didn't know how to plan my study schedule until I knew the date of my test. In early July, I finally got my ATT. After a few days of prayer, I scheduled my exam for August 14th at 8am. I studied and prayed, and studied some more. I really buckled down in the last 3 weeks before my test. You kind of have to when your nursing career lies in the balance.
The week of my test, I prayed and told God that I was giving Him all my stress, all my anxiety, and that I had done what I could to prepare and the rest was in His hands.
Of course, being a human, and being Holly, I struggled that week. I prayed that prayer, but didn't quite give all my stress and anxiety away until the last days before my test. Let me just tell you, when I finally let go, what a wave of peace that washed over me. I mean, it's hard to quite put it into words.
I arrived at the testing facility 30 minutes early, as I was told. I prayed and listened to some good jams on KLove and just sat in my car, with total peace. I texted my husband and my parents to let them know I had made it safely and that I would let them know when I got out of the test. There is a strict "no phones allowed" policy, in fact, the whole process is a very high security ordeal. So, I left my phone in the car and only took in my drivers license and a black ink pen.
We had to check in and scan our palms in the waiting room. Then we had to put what belongings we had in a locker, then palm scan again to get into the actual testing room.
You could cut the tension in the room with a knife. I recognized one girl from my school, but didn't know her name, and the rest of the people in the room were taking their LPN state boards.
As soon as my number was called, my stomach flip-flopped a bit, and I was seated at my computer. The next two hours are kind of a blur, even still. I said a prayer before I started, a prayer before every questions, and a prayer of thanks when I made my decision before I submitted each question. The test automatically gives you a break at 2 hours, and it just so happened that I was at question number 74 when it did. With the NLCEX, you can take a minimum of 75 questions, and a maximum of 275 questions. So after I submitted number 74, I said a bit of a longer prayer, and clicked "no" when it asked me if I wanted to take my 2 hour break, took a deep breath, and started question 75. After I had decided on my answer, I clicked submit. I held my breath. It felt like a long time passed, but in reality it was probably more along the lines of 5 seconds. My screen went blue and it told me that I had finished my exam. Then I had to fill out a review and submit it before I could leave. I had a LOT of SATA (select all that apply) which is normally a good indication, since those are higher level questions, but I couldn't believe that I only took 75 questions. I was so relieved and so tired at the same time, that I felt numb about the whole experience. But I felt like a huge weight had dropped off of my shoulders. It was done. I had taken the NCLEX.
I called my husband first. Then I talked to my mom and dad. I met my husband for coffee, then met my dad for lunch. I was mentally drained and was ready to get home and take a nap. That's exactly what I did after we were done with lunch. Then the waiting began. It usually takes 48 hours to get your results, but since I took it on a Friday, I knew I would have to wait until at least Monday morning.
It was a LONG weekend.
My husband tried to distract me, bless him. We went to Fayetteville and to the farmers market and he bought me flowers. My family tried to distract me on Sunday. Monday morning rolled around and nothing had posted. I checked all day long. NOTHING. I prayed and tried to stay calm, but that's easier said than done.
Tuesday morning, my bladder woke me up before my alarm went off. It was probably about 4:30 in the morning. I decided to take my phone with me, just in case. I checked the two sites that I knew my license would post on, just in case. I saw my name and my RN license next to it. I wanted to jump up and down and scream, but again, it was 4:30 in the morning. Then my phone buzzed, it was my friend Brittany texting me congratulations, because she was getting ready for work and wanted to check and see if my results had posted too!
I crawled back into bed and nudged my husband, who smiled and said congrats, wrapped me in a bear hug, and promptly fell back asleep. Bless. :)
It is a huge accomplishment and I can say that God helped me through it, along with lots of prayer and encouragement from my friends and family, and for that I am so thankful.
( Also, I NEVER want to take that test again.)
Be blessed,
Holly Nicholson, RN
